loveletters

Since the first time I got infatuated, I always had the passion for writing love letters. Of course, I didn’t have the nerve to be sending those letters at that time. But as I grow up, I become more open in communicating. I will answer back letters from my suitors even if I really don’t like the person. There was this someone who wooed me who works abroad. I just didn’t have the heart not to answer his letters. He was such one nice man to me and my family. Even if he can’t even spell my name correctly. But then, it was more of an encouraging letter because I know how it was hard for him to be miles away. I shy away from talking about love and all that. And yes, there was a point in my college years that I would write someone even if he won’t bother to answer those letters.. He never became my bf and yet, he became one of the most important male friends I have in my college years. Now, I can laugh over those things. It was just a mere part of past.

I had scrapbooks of all the letters that I had including those little notes from my friends. It was a precious thing for me receiving cards on any occasions. I had my diaries, my autographs, my collections of my favorite quotations and all that stuff.

But I really started to be writing a real love letter when I had my first boyfriend. We worked at the same office but I never failed to give him a card, a letter, or a poem whenever we had our “monthsary.” I even encouraged him to learn how to write because I just love the feeling of receiving a letter and what more if it will come from the man I love. In fairness, he wrote fantastic and even lengthy letters. He was such an honest to goodness man that you could feel his sincerity. Though, at some point how I wished he used with me those flowery words every woman would love to hear. He would not even try to impress me as he just wrote on pages ripped from a notebook. That was very much like of him. Unassuming and prudent always.

When I resigned from that office and decided to be back at my hometown, he wrote a letter on the day that I left and I got it two days after I arrive. When he was the one who left for abroad, I constantly wrote him that upon returning home, he had kept a box of it. That continued for years until some time e-mail had become more economical and accessible for us. Still I see to it that I have his e-mail printed and kept in my file of love letters.

Today, I cannot write that often anymore especially that we’ve been together for the past three months. But of course, I text him with those sweet messages even if he’s just sitting next to me. Or, we will keep on chatting and exchanging thoughts while I’m in the office and he’s on an internet cafe. Everyday is always a wonderful time to reach out, to tell him that I still feel overwhelmed of his love as I used to. Our relationship keeps on evolving because we communicate, we express our feelings, and we listen to each other all the time.

An open letter to my future boyfriend….

At 21, I won’t be ashamed to admit that I’ve long been waiting for you. In fact, I’m getting insecure day by day. Am I not that attractive enough? You see, I am just an ordinary girl longing for my prince charming. But you need not worry, I won’t go for looks. For when I fall in love, I will make sure that it goes deeper beyond physical attraction. And I would expect the same from you.

There were many Valentine’s Day, Christmas seasons, and JS Proms that I have been hunting fro your existence. During those times, I felt certain emptiness and I know it will only be a special man who could fill that space…it is always meant for you. All these time I resist the temptation of holding on my ardent suitors or hooking my crushes. I even allowed myself o be a laughing stock of my friends. They would often tease me that it is no longer an asset not having a boyfriend at my age. Then, there was never any regret about it. For I know deep in my heart someone is worth of my long wait.

When I finally meet you, I want you to be a man who knows his strengths and weaknesses, who speaks well of his family, who cares for his girl, and who fears God. I don’t need a man wrapped in a golden package that is only glittering from the outside. I just want you to be yourself and all the flaws I would see in you that I would continue to love.

I promise to be a girl with whom you can share your fears, build your dreams with, and inspire you to be always a better person. You will be my man, not just an accessory to walk with me on parties, accompany me to a movie, or parade you in front of my friends.

I wonder what kind of girlfriend I am going to be like. But for sure, my not having boyfriend in the past is not a reason fro me to act as an immature brat. When I become too demanding don’t hesitate to tell me, “enough”. I wouldn’t care you correcting my mistakes, criticizing my attitude or bringing me to an argument. Yet, do not expect me to be the underdog type. Of course, I can be patient. But there are also times when I wake up at the wrong side of the bed. When that happens, I would appreciate if you can extend me your understanding and just make me laugh. After all, it’s never too difficult pleasing me.

When you got the chance to know the real me, I hope I wouldn’t be a big disappointment. Behind this cold and uncaring me is a girl who always longed for a man to fill my romantic fantasies and appreciate my being too sentimental. I know you will be there to make me realize that love is a wonderful thing. Rest assured that I will always be there for you to hang on to during tough times.

Remember that I am your partner and we need not compete. Don’t feel intimidated by my achievements in as much as I’ll render full support on your own. I hope you’ll treasure our relationship and pray for that to grow into a deeper foundation. I may sound too idealistic but I always wanted my boyfriend to be the first and the last. And, I am giving you that privilege. When I say that I want you to be my boyfriend, I intend to keep you forever. Please don’t fail me. I would not want to reach the point that we have to let each other go. If I love you, I would demand at least an half of the love I am giving.

I swear I may not be a perfect girlfriend, but I will do my best to come close to perfection.

just one of those stuffs i've written seven years ago & a month before i had my 1st bf (&   my last too!!!) 3sha